Let Go

I must let go so he can do what he has been created to do. Over the past few years I have been letting go little by little while also supporting Artillery guy through many challenges and experiences. When he traveled to Europe for a ski camp, his money card didn't work so we had to figure out how to wire money via Western Union. He figured it out. Then there were the girl problems. An early romance left his tender heart bruised and it remains hurt to this day. Artillery boy was always a whimsical boy living between the real world and some fantasy planet. That first love that broke his heart, also broke his spirit. He dug himself into a hole and had to work for a few years to get back out. As much as I liked each of his girlfriends, it is time to go off and work on himself. He needs to grow and become a man. The Army may make him stronger and self reliant. We shall see. Especially with Covid changes, I am happy that he is getting a head start in the Army.

I did get my hug and tears out before the recruiter came to pick him up. I was up at 5am to run to Walmart for a combination lock (side thought his wife will have a tough time filling my shoes. I am sorry.) As I walked toward the check out thinking of all the things I could buy Artillery boy the lights went off. The woman at the check out told me to hurry before her register quit. Done. Mission accomplished. A combination lock and truck magazines. Then I headed home completely exhausted and on the verge of tears just like the aftermath of each baby being born. 

 We allowed Artillery boy to sleep until 9:30 before waking him up for his favorite breakfast sandwich. Around 9:45 we ran to register for absentee voting before AB headed out to say goodbye to a friend. Back home around 11:45 we all sat around the table peppering AB with questions that just drove him further into his shell. He is anxious, excited, nervous, every emotion in the book and here we are making it worse. The recruiter called at noon and said, "Are you on your way to the office?" AB, "No, I was told you were coming here." Recruiter, "Ok." I kept pacing not knowing what to do with myself. I sat next to AB quietly. We went through the duffle bag and supply list. And we waited. finally around 1:15 the recruiter showed up. We were all running around and then before we knew it AB was in the truck heading off to Basic training.

We did catch a picture before the recruiter arrived. You can see that AB is excited about the photo. It is our life. I am proud of my boy. He needs to go away to grow. After he was out of sight, I took the littles to the river. At one point, I thought maybe the paperwork isn't done for the court case. All of the sudden, I realized I don't want him to come back. He needs to launch into this next stage. This is what I have raised him for. To be a man, and to grow. Then Grandma asked what was wrong with his eye. Nothing. Or maybe...yea...is it palsy? Will they send him home? No fear. This kid is going to get it done.